Falling in love with reality
Posted on | August 20, 2010 | 9 Comments
I once heard a friend say she wishes she could fall in love with reality. I relate to that statement because for the most part, I deny it. I pretend it doesn’t exist, I fight it, I spend my days wanting it to go away.
After I serve my baby a meal, there is clean up. It takes 10 minutes to wipe her down, wash her plates and wipe down her eating area. This process happens 3 times a day, yet each time I find myself complaining and fighting it. Its like I’m surprised its happening again.
Being a stay-at-home-mom involves laundry, cooking and planning activities. I am surprised and put-out every time I have to do those things. I find myself thinking, “Not Again!” or “Why do I have to do this?” Every.damn.time.
I suppose I’m a bit like an 8 year old who fights bedtime and acts surprised every night when they are confronted with the idea.
When I put food in my mouth I pretend the consequences don’t exist. So I am surprised when the scale goes up or my jeans are tight. Part of my journey lately has been realizing that if I want to be thin, I must eat less. Not rocket science, but for an addict who lives in denial it might as well be.
Every choice has its consequence. Giving my husband a foot rub last night led to him letting his guard down (which was much needed after I ordered him to do chores earlier). Yes, I’m slipping on my commitment to shut-up and stop nagging. But my point is, that every thing I do has its price/pay-off.
What a responsibility! Oh my. This means that I have to be accountable for my promises, and for how I live my life. No more wishing things away. Eating was always part of that. If I didn’t like what was happening in my life, I would just eat and fantasize about how I wanted it to be. This never really paid off the way I wanted it to. It only made me 230 pounds and lonely.
Reality, I have a crush on you. Its not love yet, but I’m working on it.
How do you fight reality? What are you looking to fall in love with? Comment here.
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9 Responses to “Falling in love with reality”
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August 21st, 2010 @ 3:53 pm
hello, wake-up call to me.
I love this. & I’m determined to fall in love with my reality.
August 31st, 2010 @ 8:40 am
[...] You know when you stumble across a blog post that completely rocks your world? & it’s sweet because the owner of said blog probably doesn’t even comprehend the magnitude at which she may or may not have just changed your life. By a few paragraphs, a few thoughts, & penning it all down on the internet. It happened to me the other day when Chrisa wrote this. [...]
August 31st, 2010 @ 9:11 am
This is so me. Only more pounds than you and still kinda lonely. 230 sounds good to me now. I am a total food addict. Vicious cycle. Hate on reality, eat, hate reality more. Rinse. Repeat. Will try to break.
August 31st, 2010 @ 9:46 am
I’ve been on a similar journey lately. I’ve been calling it living intentionally, but really, it’s loving your reality as well. I needed to slow down and live intentionally in every moment. Be present. And, experience it. Not worry about what was next or curse the damn dishes when the sink gets full. Stand there and wash them and thank God for the family that I have, to feed, and love.
Great post.
August 31st, 2010 @ 9:47 am
AWESOME post. it is such a struggle to stay positive and fall in love with your own life. I am always wishing things away. No more!
August 31st, 2010 @ 2:15 pm
What a great post!
September 1st, 2010 @ 7:29 am
[...] Sep I read a post over at Heir to Blair which was based on a post at Life From Both Sides. It’s a thought that, like Heir to Blair, hit me smack in the face. Neither of their posts [...]
September 4th, 2010 @ 2:59 pm
I love this! This has inspired me more than you can imagine.
September 16th, 2010 @ 7:47 pm
This is me in so many ways. Eating, taking care of my SAHM duties (hate them!), everything. Thanks for sharing! The next time I’m forgetting my reality I’m going to try to remember this.